Let Battle Commence!

Asterisk asterisk asterisk!

You know those good old fashioned battles, where one nob gathered his few scores of men on one hill and the other on the hill opposite. They squared up, they roared all the stirring songs, then someone shouted “Charge!”

I walked into town to pick up my post, and noticed all the shiny new staff in a shop that’s opening today gathered in the front of their shop, looking somewhat nervous, with all their dressed-up mannequins (their secret weapon?) standing at their backs.

In the square outside, in the rain, a sort of portable radio station was playing the stirring songs to all the people gathering, clutching their opening day discount vouchers. The press was building, all eyes were on the doors, waiting for the signal…

I imagine anyone going into town later today will see the shop utterly wrecked; bodies everywhere, scraps of clothing, the odd arm or leg of a ravaged mannequin…

We humans do like a good scrap don’t we, as long as it’s largely fictional. I wonder who will win?

(NB Turned out it was the grand opening of a certain corporate ‘discount’ store)

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